Sometimes when everything in our mind and body screams at us to dig deep, we resist, we procrastinate, we go to do something else. Why is this and what do I mean by dig deep?
I suppose it boils down to two things for me: it means going deeper than the surface, of my life, the given circumstance or the emotional entanglement I currently encounter. It also means going into a place I’d rather not go because it will call for an honesty to myself I would rather not explore, identify, or allow to surface into my awareness at the time.
It’s a little like an ingrown toenail. It irritates and intrudes on my general well-being until I address it. I know it will cause some physical pain, however to ignore it, it will only grow deeper, find a spot where it won’t hurt for a time, but will arise again in my awareness until it has been addressed somehow.
It will also demand physical awareness in my body. Where is it, how to wiggle it to dislodge its hold on my flesh, what tools will I need to do the job? It will take time. I likely will not get it the first time, maybe not even the second or third. Each time I worry it, wiggle it, worm it out of its place of comfort into my physical and emotional space before letting it go where it now belongs—in the garbage, released from its hold on me.
It is pleasant? No. Is it necessary? Yes. Do I have the right tools? Sometimes yes; sometimes no. Either way, I troubleshoot the reality, and find the tools or improvise. The tools I have in my kit that guide and assist me in uprooting, digging deep and digesting include six elements: muscle testing as a guide; willingness to find an answer that holds true for the moment; a small action to register this new awareness; celebrate the win; acknowledge its gifts for showing up in my life; let it go in gratitude.
Do I manage to do this each time? Maybe no, maybe yes. I don’t always identify them as such, yet they occur over time one step at a time.
Take the ingrown toe as an example.
Muscle test: Yes, this needs to be addressed a second time
Willingness: In this instance it is 5:00AM and there is a part of me wants to stay in my warm bed, but the toe is clearly uncomfortable. It has awoken me.
Action: Yep, I need to get up. Yep, I have the tools needed for the job. Physical limitations aside, I have to have a go. I may have to call in help, but I will try again to wiggle it free.
Acknowledgement: According to Louise Hay in Heal Your Body an ingrown toenail indicates a concern about moving forward. Mmmm. In what ways am I resisting moving forward? This will take some mulling. Where do I need to move forward, how? What is stopping me (thoughts, emotions, feelings in and out of my body, opinions, behaviors, judgements etc?)
Celebrate: Now that I have mulled sufficiently via journaling and tracking in my Memory Keeper, I have some answers that will help me move forward. I may have to peel another layer of the onion at a later date, although for right now I have the next step to move me forward. Truth is, as humans we are only able to take one step at a time. Where did the original “idea” arise that a problem could be solved instantly? In one step a leap could be made? Seriously, it is only one step at a time that we get from A to B. So I celebrate that one step. Cheer for myself; clap my hands for taking that step. I am like a toddler; I smile, grin and feel the joy of that baby step and celebrate. I dance a little. Wiggle my butt.
Gratitude: Feel the love towards myself for being brave and taking the step. It will lead to another and that can happen now if I choose, or on another occasion—with an ingrown toenail the chances are I’ll have another opportunity. Lucky me!
Resources: Your Power to Heal—Resolving Psychological Barriers to Your Physical Health—Henry Grayson, PhD [a great book all the way through however there is a great section on Muscle Testing] & Your Body Doesn’t Lie Dr. John Diamond [another great book on ways to muscle test].
Writing Practice: Identify something in your body that bothers you, nothing too big. The purpose of this writing practice is to lightly journal about a twinge, ache, or discomfort without muscle testing simply to grow an awareness of what goes on in your body. An example may be an ache in the neck. Write for five minutes and see what surfaces. This awareness may help you towards a solution and resolution. Play your way through the six stages above and see what surfaces for you. Keep it light. In-Joy!